suspectclass (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
suspectclass) wrote2002-03-25 01:45 pm
suspectclass) wrote2002-03-25 01:45 pm
The Bitch is Back
What is battering?
Battering is a pattern of behavior where one person tries to control the thoughts, beliefs or actions of a partner, friend or any other person close to them. It can include physical, emotional, sexual and/or economic abuse. While some folks who are battered fight back, battering is never mutual. Battering happens in lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, intersex, and straight communities and crosses all social, ethnic, racial, and economic lines. An individual's size, strength, politics, gender presentation, or personality does not determine whether s/he can be battered or a batterer.
No one has the right to batter and no one deserves to be battered.
From The Network/La Red: "Have You Been Told"
But I've never hit you!
Battering is not about physical violence, it's about control. Hitting is often unnecessary to maintain control in a relationship. Verbal, emotional and economic abuse can be powerful and devastating weapons.
You've hit me too, so if I'm abusive, so are you.
Battering is never mutual. Although both partners may use violence, batterers do so to control their partners; survivors use violence in self-defense or to try to stop the abuse.
You don't understand - I'm just being butch.
Blaming abusive behavior on being butch is both insulting to butches and plain denial. While some butches batter, so do some femmes. You and/or your batterer may identify as butch, femme or neither. Battering can happen in all kinds of relationships, regardless of sexual or gender identity.
I thought you liked rough sex.
No one wants or likes to be raped or battered. Although some batterers may say their abusive behavior is really just part of an s/m scene, s/m requires the consent of all involved, and a scene can be stopped by any participant at any time. If your partner is disrespectful of your limits, ignores your safe word, or violates your boundaries, it's not s/m - it's battering.
Women are safe, we don't batter each other.
Abuse occurs in relationships between women as often as in straight relationships, and women have been seriously injured and killed by their female partners.
From "You May Be Battered If"
Has you walking on eggshells and you change your behavior to deal with their moods.
Ridicules or humiliates you.
Seems like two different people.
Tries to control where you go and what you do. You don't see family or friends to avoid their jealousy or anger.
Wants you to need them for money or expects you to support them.
Accuses you of having affairs or cheating on them.
Accuses you of lying.
Blames you for their problems.
Gives you the silent treatment.
Leaves you unsure where an s/m scene begins or ends or disrespects your safe words, rules or boundaries.
Threatens you, screams at you, throws things, breaks or steals your things.
Blames their behavior on alcohol, drugs or a history of abuse.
Uses your race, age, sexual identity or orientation, gender identity or presentation, ability, immigration status, class, body size or appearance, religion, HIV status, etc. against you.
Battering is a pattern of behavior where one person tries to control the thoughts, beliefs or actions of a partner, friend or any other person close to them. It can include physical, emotional, sexual and/or economic abuse. While some folks who are battered fight back, battering is never mutual. Battering happens in lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, intersex, and straight communities and crosses all social, ethnic, racial, and economic lines. An individual's size, strength, politics, gender presentation, or personality does not determine whether s/he can be battered or a batterer.
No one has the right to batter and no one deserves to be battered.
From The Network/La Red: "Have You Been Told"
But I've never hit you!
Battering is not about physical violence, it's about control. Hitting is often unnecessary to maintain control in a relationship. Verbal, emotional and economic abuse can be powerful and devastating weapons.
You've hit me too, so if I'm abusive, so are you.
Battering is never mutual. Although both partners may use violence, batterers do so to control their partners; survivors use violence in self-defense or to try to stop the abuse.
You don't understand - I'm just being butch.
Blaming abusive behavior on being butch is both insulting to butches and plain denial. While some butches batter, so do some femmes. You and/or your batterer may identify as butch, femme or neither. Battering can happen in all kinds of relationships, regardless of sexual or gender identity.
I thought you liked rough sex.
No one wants or likes to be raped or battered. Although some batterers may say their abusive behavior is really just part of an s/m scene, s/m requires the consent of all involved, and a scene can be stopped by any participant at any time. If your partner is disrespectful of your limits, ignores your safe word, or violates your boundaries, it's not s/m - it's battering.
Women are safe, we don't batter each other.
Abuse occurs in relationships between women as often as in straight relationships, and women have been seriously injured and killed by their female partners.
From "You May Be Battered If"
no subject
blah, bad memories.
a.
Re:
They seem to do good things, you could check out the site. If you are going to be in boston this summer, they might be good people to hook up with.