I am at home, though only briefly before I fly to California tomorrow. Dad is actually coming to the airport to pick me up, which is fairly neat. He's bringing my sisters so perhaps we'll be wild and actually hit Del Taco before heading back to the Valley. I must admit to feeling even more apprehensive than usual about this trip. I'm excited to be seeing my sisters, but as I actually *made* their gifts this year, I'm nervous they'll do that polite "oh how nice" thing and I'll know they hate them. Additionally, and even more nerve-wracking is the fact that I'm meeting my dad's new girlfriend. You know, I was always so happy that my parents both remarried when I was so young so that I didn't have to go through all of this. I still can't believe that it's another Christmas without Gail and I'm sure as hell not ready for a new step-mother. We're doing all of the Christmas stuff with just the four of us though, so I can be nice the rest of the time.

There's a rumor that snow-boarding is in my near future, so I busted out the ski pants and sexy fleece, as well as my winter boots which I oh-so-cleverly left here this fall. Oops. I'm looking forward to a day of falling on my ass on the slopes. I'm also looking forward to the fact that I'll spend every night there working on my special studies paper. NOT!

::sigh:: I know that my journal isn't terribly interesting because I don't post very much and when I do I either post foof or I outline some event and don't talk about my feelings or take the time to construct humorous or even coherent monologue. This journal thing started when I really needed an outlet and didn't really have one. It was very useful to me for a long time as a way of getting my thoughts out there in a way that wouldn't injure others or myself (for the most part). I've become more self-concious about putting myself out there, more aware of the possibility that someone might come across who I don't want to see this. On top of all of that, many of the things I need to get out are things that a) I don't feel comfortable discussing with more than a handful of people b) I don't discuss generally even with them and c) I don't want to put the energy into to write anything significant about. In other words, repress repress repress. Now I'm pretty much back to jotting down some thoughts before running off to do something else. Plus I really don't have the time, but how many of you people do? That's what I thought. So have no fear, no one else gets any substantial content out of me either. Ew. Angst. ::squash::

The tree is decorated, I'm getting maudlin. I think it's time for bed.


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