The Onion

[suspectclass]

"When I grow up, I want to be gay," said Christopher Linn, 8, a second-grader at Philadelphia's Lakeside Elementary School, one of thousands of public schools nationwide that actively promote the homosexual agenda. "I don't want to have a family or go to church."

Comments

heh

[kathrot.livejournal.com]

"The gay lifestyle is for me," said James Miller, an Oklahoma City father of four who recently moved to Provincetown, MA, to pursue a career in bath-house management. "When I was a family man, I constantly had to worry about things like taking the kids to Little League practice, paying for their braces, and remembering my wife's birthday. But now that I'm gay, I'm finally free to focus all my energy on having non-stop, mind-blowing anal sex."

Re: heh

[milosh.livejournal.com]

why am *i* not having that sex?? must i move to p-town??

haha, down with the church! down with the fam! up with the homos!

:P

myles the hoooommoooo

Re: heh

[kathrot.livejournal.com]

"Jeremy (http://www.theonion.com/onion3531/homosexual_in_closet.html) is one of those students I'll never forget," said Marcia Krause, Schuitt's middle-school drama teacher. "He was so sweet and so talented?you should have seen him in Pippin. I wonder where he is now. San Francisco or the West Village, I suppose."

See?!? P-Town isn't necessary...San Francisco and the West Village are also homo-centric gathering spots.

hehe.

[freakysparks.livejournal.com]

When I grow up, I want to be employed.

Re: heh

[milosh.livejournal.com]

oh, sweeeeet! i'm all set!

[eveandodd.livejournal.com]

Watch out, you silly Catholic! God hates you!!

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0082/0082_01.asp

(But I don't)

Love, eve

Re: heh

[masscooper.livejournal.com]

I like down with homos...down on their knees.

Ry

Re:

[masscooper.livejournal.com]

Did you see the one on gays?

Better, did you see the Space Moose on Chick?

Ry

Re: heh

[milosh.livejournal.com]

oh boy! what an idea!

;)